Sin & Punishment
by Phil From Produce
Summary: The Warners get caught up in a crime and have to go through community service. WARNING: May be offensive to people from the south. Read at your own discretion.
1. A nice little old lady

Chapter 1 - Framed!

()()()()

Burbank California, is a beautiful city to live in. Not perfect, but beautiful. There are a lot of evil people in it. Thieves, Burglars, Hackers, Repo agents, just to name a few. Sometimes, these evil people will cross paths with the innocent, and the innocent are affected by the crossed paths. Such is the case for 3 siblings, currently running through a peaceful park, where people sit and do internet work, play sports. But some of them are trying to make an honest living. And some try to make it look like they're making an honest living. Such is the case of a man selling hotdogs.

"Let me get this straight, bud! You expect me to pay 6$ for one of these shriveled up pieces of starch-filled, chemical pumped combinations you call a hot dog?" asked Yakko to the Hot dog vender

"No speaky english. 6$. taste good!" The hot dog vendor spoke

"What a rip-off!" Added Wakko

"Come on, Sibs, We'll go eat at taco bell." Yakko began to walk off. Dot and Wakko followed after him.

"Why do stupid things like hot dogs have to be so expensive?" asked Dot

"I guess the guys that make the weiners are unionized." Yakko replied

"Or it's a government ploy to get people to spend their money at corporate supermarkets." Wakko added in.

Yakko turned the audience "See folks! We're educating your children about capitalism! Aren't we just the bee's knees?" Yakko smiled with his big teeth.

"You'd better put those away. You'll scare people." Dot informed her eldest brother

"Ah, who's scared of big teeth these days?" asked Yakko

"People with odontophobia?" asked Wakko

"Eh, you've got a point." Yakko put his teeth away.

As the Warners walked down the path, their attention was directed to an elderly lady guiding a cop towards them.

"it's them! those are the 3 hooligans!" She hollered while pointing at the Warners.

"Hey! what's the big idea?" Yakko wanted to know

The old woman was all worked up.

"These 3...Won't stop prank calling me!" she hollered

"Now calm down, Miss Terbate, We'll get this settled." Said the cop

Yakko and his siblings crossed their arms as the cop approached.

"I'm Constable Loney. Now this lady claims that you 3 were prank calling her phone."

"Constable Loney? As in Baloney?" asked Yakko

"Don't rub it in, kid." gritted Constable Loney

Of course the Warners had not. they had spend the last 2 hours watching a movie at the local theatre, and had just left to get some more snacks before heading back to the Warner movie lot. Wakko was quick to defend.

"But how could we have prank called this lady? We were just watching a movie!" Wakko argued

"Just how exactly were you pranked, Miss Terbate?" asked Yakko

"You hooligans keep on calling me, yet every time I get to the phone, no one answers!" Miss terbate complained.

"Are you sure your reciever's not broken?" asked Yakko

"Yes!"

"Phone jack plugged in?" Yakko interrogated the old lady

"Yes!"

"Volume turned up?" asked Yakko

"Absolutely!"

Yakko didn't believe a word the old lady was saying. And neither did the cop. He could see right through the old woman, and how her mind must have been slipping.

"You kids want to come with me?" asked the cop

"But we didn't do anything!" Wakko complained

"We can't go to jail!" Dot added

"You're not goin' to jail. I just wanna get this settled, and i'll give you a ride home." the cop reassured the siblings.

"In the cop car?" asked Wakko

"No, in my $250,000 lamborghini."

"Oh, poo! I'll never get to sit in a cop car." Wakko complained.

()()()

The Police officer drove all of the subjects to Miss Terbate's apartment.

"Now ma'am, tell me where your telephone is." Asked Constable Loney

"It's over here." Miss Terbate pointed to an old phone in the corner.

"That thing's ancient." Dot replied

"Kinda like this old lady." Yakko quickly shot off to the audience.

The old lady somehow heard him.

"I heard that! And so did God." The old lady responded

"Hey! I read that book. The Devil did it." Yakko replied

"Ah! I was just at the good part! Why'd you have to spoil it?" Wakko complained

"Quiet, everyone." Constable Loney ordered.

The Constable picked up the reciever on the phone, and didn't even hear a dial tone.

"Well, Miss Terbate, your phone isn't even working." Said Constable Loney

"Really! It should be! It's plugged in!"

The elderly lady pointed to a jack in the wall, indictating her phone was plugged in, along with the power cord. But obviously, the phone itself was very old, and well used.

"Ma'am, this phone is ages old. I'd buy a newer one if I were you." The cop informed the old lady

"But...I bought this phone brand new from Sears Roebuck in 1977! They said it would last forever." The old lady argued

"Ah, good old Mr. Rogers Neighborhood." Yakko replied

"And telephones nowadays, I wouldn't know how to use one!"

The cop had just about enough of the old woman wasting his time.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but these kids didn't do anything wrong."

"But...I swear it was them! I'm no liar!" complained Miss Terbate

"Come on kids, We'll head down to the precinct and i'll give you a ride home. My shift's over anyways." Constable Loney headed for the door, with the Warners in tow.

But Miss Terbate didn't want the Warners to go away scot free. She was determined to have them hauled off. So she intentionally fell on the floor.

"OW! That big one! He hit me, officer!" Miss Terbate cried on the floor.

Constable Loney turned around, and noticed the lady had thrown herself on the floor.

"Ma'am, are you ok?" asked Constable Loney

"No! that big one, he knocked me over! He's a no-good hooligan!"

Yakko stood there, completely dumbfounded.

"Some people, eh?" Yakko asked the audience.

()()()()


	2. Book 'em

Chapter 2 - Book em

()()()

15 minutes later, Yakko, Wakko, and dot were sitting in the back of a cop car, being driven to the police station.

"Old people. God, they're the worst." Complained Constable Loney

"Please don't take us to jail!" begged Wakko

"You're not goin' to jail, kid! We just have to process ya for court. You'll walk away free. Old hag will probably forget the court date or something."

"Even though you know we're innocent?" asked Dot

"Hey, I know you're all innocent, but if i don't bring you 3 in, i'll get in trouble. It's better we all just get this over with so no one gets in trouble."

"Scratchy's gonna flip when he sees us come home with the cops." Yakko wasn't looking forward to that at all.

After a long drive, Constable Loney eventually got back to the precinct, and brought all 3 warner siblings into the station. He walked in, and was immediately greeted by the chief.

"So these are the 3." Said the Chief

"We didn't do it!" Wakko pleaded his case

"We're innocent!" Said Dot

"We'll even take a Porygon test to prove it!" Wakko claimed

"It's polygraph, Wakko." Dot corrected her brother.

Obviously, Constable Loney knew the siblings were somewhat in distress, but he wanted to calm the situation down with some humor.

"You're all innocent. We've dealt with Miss Terbate before. Poor old woman, She called in once claiming that the referee wasn't being fair with the wrestlers. Turns out, we get there and she was watching the washing machine, and thought the 2 blouses inside were the rock and stone cold wrestling."

"Or the time she thought the goodwill stole her copy of jurassic park on VHS." added the chief

"Or that time her grandson was playing Mario kart wii and Bowser ran his mii over."

The Warners were more calm now. Constable Loney then brought them over to another room.

"So what were your names again, kids?" asked Constable Loney

"We're the Warner brothers!" Yakko and Wakko responded

"And the Warner sister!" Added Dot

"I'm Yakko!"

"I'm Wakko!"

"And i'm Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca the third!" replied Dot.

"That's a little hard to believe." said Constable Loney

"It's true. Here's my ID!" Dot handed over her ID card.

"Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca the third, Also goes by Dot Warner." Constable Loney read the card. "Great. Where do you live?"

"Home." Wakko replied

"That's not good enough, Wakko." Dot criticised her brother

"Well, what's our technical address?" asked Wakko

"4000 Warner Blvd, Burbank, CA 91505." Replied Yakko "I memorized it off the back of our copy of the outsiders."

"...91505...Ok, So we're done. I'll give you guys a phone call when the court dates are set. I'm sure you guys are gonna win the case, Hands down."

"Will we win if our hands are up?" asked Wakko

Constable Loney ignored Wakko's joke.

"Ok, i'm gonna take you guys home. My Lambo's out in front."

()()()()()


	3. Disorder in the Court

Chapter 3 - Liberty and Justice for all

()()()()

The day came. Yakko, Wakko, and Dot were all sitting behind the defendant's podium.

"Glad to see you all came on time." Said Constable Loney, wearing his suit. Yakko and Wakko were also in nice suits, while Dot wore a fair dress.

"So, when is the crazy old lady gonna show up?" asked Wakko

Dr. Scratchansniff was sitting in the row behind the Warners.

"Vakko! Zhis is not zhe time to say such things!"

"But we don't want to sit here, waiting." Said Dot

"I'm bored already!" Wakko complained

About 10 minutes passed before Miss Terbate entered the courtroom, in what looked like polyester Pants and an old mickey mouse sweater. She had a baseball cap on with duct tape over the front.

"I'm sorry that i'm late! That gentleman in that 2-4-0something or other was very rude! It was only a scratch on his bumper!" she ranted

A lawyer entered the room behind her. The Warners looked over at their opposition.

"Wow. She's not holding back any punches." Said Yakko

Miss Terbate hobbled down the aisle to the Plaintiff's seat. She sat down, and glared over at the Warners. While Yakko and Wakko looked back at her, Dot stuck out her tongue and made a funny face.

(A.N. I imagine the funny face looked like the one Dot made in the "What are we?" segment)

"All parties in the case of Terbate VS Warners please stand." The Bailiff ordered

The Warners stood up, along with constable Loney. Miss Terbate's Lawyer stood up, but Miss Terbate herself stayed put.

"All rise for the honorable Judge Moe-Lester Judymathiswapnerbrown!"

Then walked in a serious looking judge, He sat down at his judge podium, and opened the file that the bailiff had.

"Ok, please be seated. this court is now in session." Judge Moe-Lester continued "Miss Betty Terbate, You are filing a charge against the 3 Warner siblings for an assault which happened at your home on April 20th of this year?" asked the Judge

"Yes I am!"

"Ok, Now, tell me what happened in your home on that day." the judge ordered.

"Well, now, let's see...Oh yes, I got up the other day and then i heard a call on the telephone, And i went to pick it up, and whoever called me hung up! I just knew it had to be those hooligans over there!" Miss Terbate raised her voice.

"Hey judge, can i charge miss terbate with murder?" asked Yakko

"What? why?" asked the judge

"Her testimony's killing me." Yakko replied.

The judge ignored Yakko's plea.

"Constable Loney, Please rise."

Constable Loney stood up.

"Constable Loney, you were the arresting officer on that day?" asked the judge

"Yes sir, I was."

"Can you tell me your side of the story?" asked Judge Judymathiswapnerbrown

"Well, I was out on patrol, it was 4 pm, I was off duty in an hour, when I was flagged by Miss Terbate, claiming that she had been prank called by a bunch of kids. She then guided me over to the Warners, and claimed they did it. We eventually returned to Miss Terbate's apartment, and disovered her phone was out of order, therefore she only thought she was being prank called. I was going to give the Warners a ride home, so i turned to the doorway, and then i heard miss terbate's cries for help. I turned around, and saw she was on the floor. She claimed that the oldest of the Warners, Yakko, pushed her over."

"Which is not true!" Yakko jumped up.

"Yakko Warner, please sit down right away." the judge ordered

Yakko did as he was told.

"Continue, Constable Loney."

"Well, considering Miss Terbate's history of calling for 911 with non-emergency situations, I came to the conclusion that she threw herself over."

"Objection!" Miss Terbate's lawyer stood up "Constable Loney did not see the actual event, therefore, Yakko Warner could have possibly pushed over my client."

"Objection sustained, Mr. Coholic. Continue, Constable Loney."

"Well, Miss Terbate was about 20 feet away from Yakko when she began crying for help, So judging from that, I made the decision that Yakko was innocent. That's all, your honor."

"Thank you, Constable Loney. You may be seated now."

Constable loney walked back to his seat and sat down.

"Now, will the main defendant please rise?" asked the Judge

Yakko got up out of his seat.

"Yakko Warner, I understand you are still a juvenile, So i'm going to keep this simple for you. Did you or did you not push over Miss Terbate?" asked the judge

"No, I did not push over miss Terbate." Yakko was acting dead serious.

"Vow, he's being really serious und behaving today." Dr. Scratchansniff commented a few rows back. Unfortunately, Yakko did not intend to stay serious for long.

"Yakko Warner, You seem like a good kid. What is it that you want in life?"

"Well, money, good health, and Keri Russell in 8 days a week." Replied Yakko

"Aren't you a little young to want a girlfriend?" asked the Judge

"Well, how about from Honey I blew up the kid, She only had a few years on me then."

"Enough, Yakko. You may sit." Said the judge. Yakko went and sat back down with his siblings.

"Felicity then? I'm not picky about the short hair."

"Yakko! Enough! Please sit."

"We were soldiers?"

"Sit!"

Yakko then sat down, but as he sat, he had one last quote.

"Mickey mouse club?"

The judge just ignored Yakko.

"Wakko Warner, would you please rise?" asked the judge

Wakko got up from the chair and approached the podium.

"Now Wakko, I'm going to ask you a few questions."

"How much are they worth? Can I use a lifeline?"

"No, these are interrogative questions, not gameshow questions." the Judge was a little irritated.

"Ok." Wakko calmly replied

"Did you use a telephone to prank Miss Terbate at any time?" asked the Judge

"No sir!" Wakko replied with confidence.

"You swear you didn't?" asked the judge

"No I don't. It's not nice to swear." Wakko replied

"No, no, I mean, you're not lying to me, are you?" the judge wanted to know.

"No lies. Cross my heart, hope to die, hands on Cindy Crawford's thighs."

"Good night everybody!" Yakko blew a kiss to the audience.

"Ok, Wakko, you may be seated." The judge ordered, while Wakko went and sat down.

"Dot Warner, would you please stand up?" asked the judge

Dot then stood up.

"Now Dot, I'm going to ask you the same question I asked your brother, Wakko."

"Ok, but i'm gonna give you the same reply." Dot said

"What's that?" asked the Judge

"That my brother did not push over miss terbate, and we all did not prank call her either."

"Objection!" The lawyer stood up again "The defendant is covering for her brother!"

"Shut up, already zou jerk!" Dr. Scratchansniff actually stood up.

"And who are you?" asked The lawyer

"I'm the Varner's guardian!" Dr. Scratchansniff said

"No wonder these kids are juvenile delinquents, with a father like you."

"I am not zhere father!" Dr. Scratchansniff angrily replied

"Enough!" The judge banged his gavel on the podium.

The whole courtroom went quiet.

"I'm going to discuss this with the jury, we'll be back with the final verdict."

()()()()


	4. The Sentence

Chapter 4 - Crime of Fashion

()()()()()

It took a 10 minute recess, But the judge returned, and he had his verdict ready.

"Well, I've come to a conclusion to this ridiculous case, and I do mean ridiculous."

"Yeah, Vith zhat dummy over zhere." Scratchansniff said to himself.

"Since there is no evidence against Yakko, Wakko, and Dot Warner, The fact that the plaintiff has a history of false accusations, and that the good track record of Constable Loney means he is a good judge of character, I'm judging that the charges of assault against the Warners, be dropped." The judge announced

The Warners all sighed a breath of relief.

"However, as a result of their behavior in the court today, I will be giving them a week of community service."

"What!" A suprised Yakko stood up

"As for Miss Terbate, I'm ordering you to be placed under psyciatric evaluation for your history with the Burbank Police and the Burbank Court of law. Case dismissed." The Judge slammed the gavel down.

Of course, Miss Terbate was irate over the judgement.

"But why! These kids are clearly guilty! Arrest them! Send them over to the war in Vietnam! They'll learn some respect for once!"

Yakko turned to the readers and said "That's the nicest grandmother anyone could ask for."

The judge was less than amused.

"Miss Terbate, This is the 5th time this year you've ordered a court case, and the 1st time you've actually showed up for one! And what's more, You came to court wearing a cap with duct tape on it!"

"I didn't like the logo on it." replied Miss Terbate.

"What logo was on it?" asked the judge

"A logo for a beer company!"

"Oh geez, Officer's Milner & McCord, Please escort Miss Terbate out of my court."

Miss Terbate began to struggle as the 2 policemen tried to take her away.

"What! Get your hands off me, I'm an old lady!" Were the last words the Warners, or anyone would hear from Miss Terbate for quite a while.

The judge looked at the warners.

"You will report tommorow to the Community services office tommorow in Burbank. They have a few jobs lined up, and considering your age, you'll be doing 1 half-hour a day. 3 & a half hours of community service."

"Hey bud! I demand a re-trial!" Yakko replied

"No re-trial. This is done." The judge left the room.

Yakko turned back to his siblings.

"Well sibs, I say we got off hard."

"Ya! almost 4 hours of community service! that's not fair!" Dot added

"I don't want to work!" Wakko complained

"Hey, it could've been worse. We could've been forced to watch the Waltons for an hour." Yakko replied

Dr. Scratchansniff walked up to the Warners.

"Let us go home no, ja? Tommorow, I vill drive you to zhe community service office and ve'll get zhis over vith."

The Warners walked out of that courtroom. They may have won the war, But they lost one battle. and it was going to cost them 3 and a half hours of freedom.


	5. She's a cranky ol' critter

Chapter 5 - Entertaining old people

()()()

Dr. Scratchansniff drove the 3 warner siblings through the traffic to the community service office in Burbank. Of course, the Warners were not so enthusiastic about their community service.

"That was a ridiculous case of injustice." Yakko commented

"Yakko, zhat's all you've been saying since ve left zhe court yesterday." Dr. Scratchansniff replied

"But it's true!" Yakko replied

"We shouldn't be doing community service! We're good kids!" Dot added

"I know, i know, But as long as zou get over zhis, the sooner you get back to doing vhat you do vhatever it is you do in zhe vater tower."

The car eventually arrived at the community service office. The 3 warner siblings sulked out of the car, and shuffled slowly into the office while Dr. Scratchansniff left. When they finally got into the office, they were greeted immediately by an average looking woman named Diane. She was wearing basic blue jeans, a white top and had a bob haircut, while wearing hipster glasses.

"My name is Diane. You must be the Warner bros." She said

"And the Warner sister!" Dot added in

"Yes, well today your first job will be simple - Since it appears you have a history in entertainment, We'll put that to good use." Said Diane

"What are ya gonna make us do? Blow each other up with dynamite?" asked Yakko

"Or hit each other with mallets?" asked Wakko

"Or shoot ourselves with a gun without any consequenses or death?" asked Dot

"No, no, I was thinking something a little less violent."

All three warners went "Awwww." as in "Awww this won't be fun."

"No, You'll be entertaining a bunch of old folks over at the Groverly."

"The Groverly? Old farts?" Asked Yakko

"Yakko, You are not allowed to call them that!" Diane scolded

"Ok, how about old geezers?" asked Yakko

"Has-beens?" Wakko added

"Sour trout?" Dot added

"Colonel blimps?" Yakko added

"Old bags?" Wakko added

"No, no, no, no, no! You will not call them those names!" Diane scolded the siblings again.

"Well, You can't call em old folks, they'll get offended!" Yakko said

Diane was getting a little irritated.

"Come on, kids! you can come up with songs to sing or a play to act on the way there!" Diane guided the warners out to her Chevy Malibu.

()()()

When the car arrived, Diane brought the siblings over to the Groverly. Almost immediately, the warners ran to the lounging area, where all the old people were drugged up, watching hollywood squares.

"Oh boy! hollywood squares! Let's watch!" Yakko sat down on the floor with his siblings, but sitting on the recliner beside him, was none other than Slappy Squirrel!

"Hey! it's Slappy!" Yakko looked over at Slappy

"Hey, would ya shut up, kid, i'm tryin' to watch the show here." Slappy replied

Yakko complied, and he and his 3 siblings had their eyes glued to the TV. on the TV, Tom Bergeron read the clue to Gilbert Gottfried.

"A majority of people who drink liquids, prefer to drink from this object."

Yakko stood up with a reply "The toilet."

Slappy smiled and looked over at Yakko.

"You remind me of a young Willie Oleson! And believe me, I know Willie."

Back on the TV, Gilbert Smiled.

"Oh yeah, I-I know this one, cause i used to work at the local toilet plant..."

The studio audience laughed, however, back at the retirement home, Slappy was less than pleased.

"Hey! I got a good question!" Slappy stood up "If Adam Lambert jumped on the public bus, would you get off?"

"I..." Wakko didn't get too far

"Don't answer it! it's a trick question!" Yakko covered his brother's mouth

"Hey! That was very naughty!" Wakko told Slappy

"Don't remind me." Slappy smirked before turning to the audience "And tell Adam that I ain't sorry for the joke."

The orderly then switched off the TV.

"Excuse me, folks." said the orderly

"You're excused!" Slappy replied "Now turn the TV back on, The young and the restless ain't gonna watch itself!"

The drugged up old people listened. Or at least the ones that wern't too drugged up did.

"Today, we have some in-house entertainment! Here they are, from the Animaniacs TV show, Yakko, Wakko, and Dot Warner!"

"Ah, great." Slappy slouched in her recliner.

Yakko, Wakko, and dot all stood up and walked to the front of the room.

"Hi-ho, everyone...uh...how's it going?" Yakko acted nervously.

There were about 3 old people, not including Slappy Squirrel, that were actually concentrating on the Warners. 2 of them were old men, the other was an old lady.

"Are...Are you Mickey mouse?" asked one of the old men.

Yakko gritted his teeth.

"God, help me through this." Yakko spoke to himself

"Wait a sec, I got a good one!" Wakko cleared his throat.

"Ok, here's a joke my friend Max told me - You know what happens when you wet the bed?" asked Wakko

"What? She asked as if she cared." Said Slappy

"Urine trouble! Get it! Urine!" Wakko grinned

Slappy was less than amused.

"Getting my butt branded in Pridemore was more fun than this." Commented Slappy.

"Wakko, these are older people, they're into a more, classy style of entertainment." Yakko implied

"Which means you're going to sing a song?" asked Wakko

"Does anyone have any requests?" asked Yakko to the old folks.

Slappy raised her hand.

"Yeah! Could you stick dynamite down yer pants?" She asked

"Um, no." Yakko made a nervous chuckle.

One of the old men raised their hand.

"Could you do a Mickey mouse voice?" he asked

Yakko piped up.

"Hey Wak, ya got any dynamite?" Yakko turned to his brother

Dot then walked to the front.

"I've got a cute song I could sing!" Dot said

"Well you might as well, this audience is half-dead anyway. Either that or high on lorazepam." Yakko commented, before helping Wakko dig through the gag bag.

Dot then cleared her throat, jumped on the piano, and began singing.

_I'm cute! Yes it's true,_

_I really can't help it, but what can i do when you're cute?_

_It just shows!_

_With these 2 darling eyes and this cute little nose_

_and a pretty pink dress..._

"Found some!" Wakko smiled, Holding up a stick of dynamite.

"Hey! I wasn't finished my song!" Dot complained, before Yakko interrupted her.

"No time for that, these people want to see dynamite down someone's pants."

"Alright!" Slappy piped up "Now this is gonna be fun!"

Yakko then walked over close to the old folks with the dynamite.

"So you all wanna see dynamite in my pants, huh? Well, let's see old Elmer over here." Yakko walked over to a drugged up old man "He's asleep, let's find out how he reacts." Yakko then dropped a lit stick of dynamite in the old man's pants. "When a half-stick of dynamite blows up in his trousers!"

"Oh boy, Poor old elmer." Slappy said sarcastically.

The dynamite blew up, waking up old Elmer.

"Uh, duh..." Elmer went back to sleep.

"Now thats...comedy!" Slappy smiled

Yakko walked back to the front of the room.

"Yakko, are you sure that was a good idea? dropping dynamite into an old man's pants?" asked Dot

"Hey, it could've been worse. We could've had to have sat through an episode of Sofia the first." Said Yakko

Wakko and Dot just stared at Yakko with a bit of distaste.

"We take offense to that!" Said Wakko

"Ya! I'm sure Snowjob was a great idea too, right?" Dot added

"Hey, Snowjob was an action figure. How could I lose?" Asked Yakko

And for the rest of the day, Despite arguements, The Warners were able to get through a half-hour of entertaining a bunch of drugged up seniors.

()()()()


	6. George Wendt's Island

Chapter 6 - George Wendt's Island

()()()()

The very next day, Hugh Jass Elementary's kindergarten class was about to get a visit. The teacher, Ms. Carrie, had volunteered to allow the Warners a half-hour to entertain and hopefully, educate the kids.

"Can I have your attention, children?" Miss Carrie asked the 5 year olds.

All the kids went quiet.

"We have 3 guests today, to sing some songs and tell a story, here they are, Yakko, Wakko, and Dot!"

Then Yakko, Wakko, and Dot walked into the room.

"Hey there!" Wakko waved

"Awwww...they're all so cute!" Dot smiled

"Well kiddos, I guess for the next half-hour you'll want to be entertained. So what are we gonna do?" asked Yakko

"How about the Slappy Squirrel theme?" asked Wakko

"Good idea." Yakko strutted over to the piano, and began strumming the keys.

_She's a cranky old critter, She's bitter, we warned ya. _

_She lives in a treehouse In Burbank, California. _

_Along with her nephew, He says, "Spew!" _

_He's cheerful, Then his aunt starts to rant _

_She gives him an earful! _

_She's grumpy, he's happy, _

_It's generation gappy. _

_Take a whirl with the squirrels, Skippy and Slappy!_

Then Slappy appeared in the doorway with Skippy.

"Ah! put a sock in it!" She yelled

Then Skippy began to sing the end with the Warners.

_That's my aunt slappy! _

The kids clapped.

"Well..." Yakko coughed a bit "I think that it's time for another song."

A little kid put his hand up.

"you have a question?" asked Yakko

"Yeah. Are you a martian? You look funny!" asked the kid

"No, but I did see a movie about martians once. It had that Christopher Lloyd guy in it." Yakko smiled

"Oh, that movie. I hated that movie." Wakko replied

"Why?" asked Yakko

"The writers were total hacks." Wakko said with confidence.

Slappy then burst into the doorway.

"Say one more bad thing about that movie and i'll put a piranha in yer bathtub!" Slappy slammed the door and walked off.

"I still don't get why she keeps popping up in our story." Dot wondered

"Well, where were we?" asked Yakko

"We were gonna sing another song." Dot got her brothers back on track.

"I could sing that song from that hypnotist commercial." said Wakko

"Oh yeah, like we wanna hear '_It's the man they call Reveen.'_ again!" Dot complained

"Hey, if you have anything better than _"i've fallen and i can't get up." _from our "slippin' on the ice." want to hear it!" Wakko came back.

"Hey, I have a great song. It's educational, so the warner bros censor board won't give us any flack." Yakko calmed his siblings down.

"This one is about looking both ways before you cross the street!" Yakko said

The teacher was ecstatic.

"Oh, that's a perfect song, sing it for the kids!" She asked

"Well ok, but you gotta promise, no recording and posting to youtube, I have some secrets to protect." Yakko grinned, before singing his heart out to the tune of the gilligan's island theme.

_oh, just sit right back_

_and you'll hear the tale,_

_a tale of an accident_

_that happened_

_in the movie lot_

_to 2 fans of george wendt_

_one of them was a big ol' lady_

_the other was really old_

_They asked us if we would take a survey_

_and we kept sayin' no_

_and we kept sayin' no_

_The traffic started to pick up_

_the ladies were in the road_

_both of them got hit by a bus_

_and squashed like a toad_

_and squashed like a toad_

_And the cops came and they took our names_

_of all the witnesses_

_like Yakko,_

_and wakko and dot,_

_Scratchansniff_

_and hello nurse_

_but the lesson was_

_look left once and look right too_

_before you cross the road!_

The teacher clapped but the kindergarteners were all confused.

"So you see kids, that's why you look both ways before you cross the road."

Then a little blonde girl put her hand up.

"Mindy, you have a question?" asked the teacher

"Why?" Mindy asked

"Because it keeps you safe." Yakko replied

"Why?" Mindy asked again

"Because I told you so." Yakko said

"Why?" Mindy asked once more.

"Cause if you don't, you'll get hit by a big truck and your brains will be splattered all over the road." Yakko replied

"Ok funny guy, I love you, bye-bye!" Mindy waved

"I have another idea." Yakko quickly spoke.

Yakko then walked up to a nearby piano and began belting out "Custard Cakewalk" By Sam Fonteyn.

"Bar fight!" Dot and Wakko yelled simultaneously.

Wakko and Dot began throwing punches, and then all the kids in the classroom began playfighting and throwing themselves over the tables and pretending they were drunken cowboys in an old spaghetti western.

"Stop! Stop! this is not good!" Miss Carrie yelled, before being tackled by a bunch of kindergarteners.

Yakko eventually got to the end of the song. By the time he did, the classroom was trashed. But all the kids were laughing.

"Well sibs, I say we did good today!" The Warners strutted out of the kindergarten class, with big smiles on their faces.

()()()


	7. Dot sings about puberty

Chapter 7 - Dot sings about puberty

()()()

The next day, after a good night's rest, the Warners were up and ready for day 3 of their 7-day ordeal. They arrived at the community service hall, on time, ready to go. Diane wasn't exactly thrilled with sending all the kindergarteners into a brawl the day before.

"Well, considering your fiasco yesterday, perhaps you need to be with an audience in your age group."

"So what does that mean?" asked Yakko

"Well, the 6th grade class of Hugh Jass Elementary has missed 2 blocks of sex ed this month." Said Diane

Wakko and Dot covered their ears, while Yakko rushed up to cover diane's mouth.

"Sex?" he asked, before letting Diane speak again

"Yes. Do you know anything about it?" asked Diane

"Who, me? I haven't even kissed a girl." Yakko pulled that line out again

"That's such a lie! Just how many times have you kissed the nurse?" asked Dot

Diane interrupted the siblings' banter.

"Listen, the teacher will give you the books to help. You can do it." Diane tried assure the warners of their upcoming goals.

()()()

In 10 minutes, the Warners were back at Hugh Jass elementary. In Mrs. Taylor's 6th grade class, the Sex education class was about to start.

"Can I have your attention, kids?" asked Mrs. Taylor

All the students lit up.

"We have 3 cartoon characters coming in today to talk to us about...sex."

The class all went "oooh."

"So with that said, Here's Yakko, Wakko, and Dot!"

The kids all looked in awe of the animated characters in front of them.

"Uhhhh...hey!" Yakko was very nervous.

Wakko opened up the sex ed book that he was given to use.

"Ahhh!" He slammed the book shut.

"What?" asked Dot

"I didn't want to see that!" Wakko exclaimed

"What did you see, Wakko?" asked Yakko

"A picture of Rosie O'Donnell in a bathing suit." Replied Wakko

Yakko interrupted his siblings to do what needed to be done.

"Ok, ok, i'm an expert in this field." Yakko grabbed a mortar stick and a dry marker.

"You see, you kids are at an age where your body's changing. My body went through some changes, so did these 2." Yakko pointed to his siblings.

"My tail got longer!" Wakko swung his tail around.

Yakko laughed a little bit.

"Yeah. So, as a result of your body hitting puberty, you might be noticing an interest in the opposite gender." Said Yakko

A girl raised her hand.

"Yes?" Yakko asked

"Did Justin bieber hit puberty?" she asked

Yakko's face went blank.

"Moving on, this means that your sexual organs are starting to develop."

A boy put his hand up.

"Yes?" Yakko asked

"Are you a Mickey Mouse rip-off?" asked the boy

Yakko snapped the mortar stick in half. Wakko then took over.

"I've got it! We could tell the story of our uncle Jack." Wakko replied

"That sounds like a great idea, Wakko! Now, let me see, what tale should we tell?" asked Yakko

"The one where uncle Jack got stuck up on the water tower?" Asked Wakko

"Oh no, not that one!" Dot pleaded for her brothers not to tell the story.

"Ah, don't fret Dot, we'll leave out all the bad parts." Yakko assured her little sister.

"Somehow I don't believe you." Dot muttered

Yakko turned to the class.

"Ok, once, way back in like 1993, long before you kids were born, There lived 3 warner siblings, all up on the Warner Bros. Water tower." Said Yakko

"And don't forget the Warner sister!" Dot added in

"Anyways, Their uncle Jack..." Yakko turned to the readers "Who really was just the nurse's boyfriend at the time.." Yakko turned back to the 6th graders "Wanted to climb up to the top of the tower, to visit his niece and nephews!"

"So what did he do?" asked Wakko

"He built a rocket ship, and he flew the rocket, up, up, up, and all the way up to the top of the tower!"

"And then what happened?" asked Wakko

"You know what happened!" Dot butted in

"Uncle jack got stuck atop the tower. So the Nurse comes over, and says to Dot..."

"Yakko! Please don't say it!" Dot pleaded

"The nurse says 'Dot, can you please help your uncle Jack off?"

All the kids started laughing.

"Ah, I still don't get why it's so funny." Wondered Wakko

"It's funny cause uncle Jack got stuck and he's got a fear of heights." Yakko replied

Mrs. Taylor broke the laughter.

"Perhaps you could sing a song about puberty." said the teacher

"I'd be able to do that!" Declared Dot

"What song is that?" asked Yakko

"Puberty girls." Dot replied

"Oh, that one. Are ya gonna need our help?" Wakko was ready to pull out his drums.

"She will." Yakko pulled out a guitar.

"I guess." Dot grabbed a microphone from nearby.

"This is Puberty girls!" The Warners all said in unison, before starting to play in the style of punk rock. the students all stood up and started headbanging and dancing to the song. Dot began to sing in a punk voice.

_She's not yet a teen_

_But somewhere in between_

_She's gonna grow, up and out_

_into her mother's jeans_

_Puberty girl! Puberty girl!_

_Comin' from a cute little thing like me_

_learn and see_

Yakko began headbanging and thrashin' around like a metalhead, while playing a wicked solo. some of the students began crowdsurfing. Dot continued to sing.

_First her legs start growin' long_

_she'll think that something's wrong_

_in hysteria, her period_

_will mess up her only thong_

_Puberty girl! Puberty girl!_

_Comin' from a cute little thing like me_

_learn and see_

Yakko contined to play the guitar. while he was thrashing around while playing the solo, Wendy O williams began thrashing with him, before running off. Dot was about to sing the last verse.

_Her breasts start coming out_

_the boys will check her out_

_But that's a hoot, cause she's so cute_

_She'll chuck their heart around!_

_Puberty girl! Puberty girl!_

_Comin' from a cute little thing like me_

_learn and see!_

Yakko then began smashing the guitar everywhere in the room, While Wakko threw the drums around, destroying them in true punk fashion. When the amps finally stopped sizzling, the class all began cheering and clapping, and then sat down as if nothing had just happened.

"So you see girls.." Dot went back to talking in her normal voice "...You'll eventually, if you haven't already, start growing in areas you never thought possible, like your breasts!" Dot said with great enthusiasm.

"Really? Where are yours?" asked one girl.

"Dont rub it in, missy." Dot gritted her teeth.

Just then, the principal ran in, and she was less than pleased.

"What the heck went on in here? All the other teachers heard what sounded like a flute player being choked!" She said

"Oh, that was just Dot's singing." Yakko replied

"Hey! it was punk rock! you're supposed to sing that way!" Dot defended herself

"Dot? your name is dot?" asked a boy from a few rows down.

"Yeah, what of it?" replied Dot

"Hah! Dottie! Dottie!" he laughed

"Ok, one warning, ya little burger bag! Call me dottie again, and you die." Dot was ready to explode from being taunted so much.

"Ok, I won't call you DOTTIE! again." The student laid back in his chair.

Of course, dot was very non-chalant about waltzing over to the student, and then pulled out a ginourmous mallet, and slammed the boy over the head with it.

Yakko and Wakko made grim faces.

"Some people have to learn the hard way." Said Yakko

The Principal grabbed the Warners by their tails.

"Ok, that's it! Seems you can't get along with people too well! I'll just have to put you somewhere where you can't bother anybody, and nobody'll bother you!"

The Principal grabbed the Warners, and dragged them down the hallway, and threw them out of the school.

"If i want ya, I know where to find ya!" The Principal Slammed the door shut. The warners dusted themselves off.

"Well." Yakko smiled "I think we pulled that off pretty well." before walking away with his brother and sister.

()()()


	8. The Larry Stringer hour

Chapter 8 - The Larry Stringer Hour

()()()

The next day, the Warners strutted up to the Community service office, and were immediately greeted by a relatively famous man.

"Are you the Warner bros and sister?" he asked

"Hey! I know you! You're Larry Stringer!" Said Wakko

"I am. Are you the Warner bros and sister?" asked Larry

"Sure am. I'm Yakko!" Yakko replied

"I'm Wakko!" replied Wakko

"And i'm cute! C'mere you big lug!" Dot jumped up into Larry's arms and gave him a smooch. She then jumped off while Larry spat out dot's saliva and wiped his face.

"I need your help." sputtered Larry

"We'd be glad to. But we have community service to attend." Yakko began walking towards the office, but not before hearing Diane's harsh voice.

"That is your community service!" Diane raised her voice at Yakko.

"What?" Dot asked

"What are we gonna do? Move the camera?" asked Yakko

"No, no, you're going to be on the show." Larry said

The Warners jaws all dropped.

"Say what?" Asked Yakko

"I need someone to fill the void today - and Diane here says that you 3 are so zany and wild, you'd make great guests on a daytime talkshow where rednecks break into fights over their cousins!" Said Larry

"Or where girls go to reveal that they're not really girls?" Asked Wakko

"Or where people with sheets over their heads fight with people of african descent?" Asked Dot

"Or where your political career as governor went to die?" asked Yakko

"Yes." Larry replied

"Uh-huh. We haven't sunk that low." Yakko began walking off, before being grabbed by the collar by Diane.

"You're gonna do this!" She said, throwing the warners into the back of her car.

()()()()

The studio audience began chanting "Larry! Larry! Larry!" and Larry Stringer walked out of the backstage area. He grabbed his cue cards and began shaking his guest's hands.

"Hey, welcome to the show! My guests today are stuck in a love triangle, and they're not even human! please meet Wakko, he's a Vertically challenged pre-adult, and he's got a lot to say, Wakko, what's goin' on?" asked Larry

"Well Larry, My name's Wakko, and i'm in love with my sister." Wakko replied

The redneck audience went "ooooh" and Larry took a light gasp of air. Offstage, Yakko and Dot were getting ready to go on.

"I can't believe we've sunk this low." Said Yakko

"With Wakko out there, saying that he's in love with me...blech!" said Dot

Back on stage, Wakko was just trying to wait for his sibs to come out.

"So you're in love with your little sister, like, do you have feelings for her?" asked Larry

"I guess." Wakko shrugged

"Well, let's meet her, her name is, Dot?" asked Larry

"Yah." Wakko replied

"Here's Dot!"

And then Dot walked out, looking so cute and innocent. She then booked it over to Larry and smooched him right on the lips, causing Larry to spit and gag.

"Awww, you're not a fun kisser!" Dot sulked

"Dot, please sit." Larry instructed.

"Ok, but you'd better not run away from me!" Dot fluttered her eyes as she sat in the chair.

"Well, Dot, welcome to the show. I understand you are having an affair with your brother."

"That's right, Larry. And let me just say, My brother is the sweetest guy I know!" said Dot

"Aww, thank you, Dot!" Wakko smiled, and hugged his little sister.

"But I also understand that there is another..." Larry broke up the feel-good moment to keep his ratings up in the air.

"Ya, um. I'm also in love with my other brother." Said Dot

The audience went "oooohhhh!" as in "That's revolting."

"Oh, boy...and his name is Yakko, right?" asked Larry

"Yes." Said Dot

"Ok, well lets bring him out! it's Yakko!"

The audience cheered, and Yakko walked out onto the stage. Almost instantaneously, Yakko and Wakko began playfighting, while the redneck audience began cheering and chanting "Larry! Larry! Larry! Larry! Larry!"

"You're with Dot, too?" asked Wakko in a rage

"I am!" Yakko replied angrily

Wakko charged again, and him and Yakko threw fake punches while Dot watched from her chair.

Eventually the Warners stopped fighting, and Larry regained control of the situation.

"Ok, well, we have to go a break, but when we come back, we're going to talk with a mermaid who's in a relationship, but her dad does not approve! We'll be right back!" Larry signaled for the TV station to go to a commercial break.


	9. Commercial Break

Chapter 9 - Commercial Break

()()()()

The first commercial was for a TV show called "Birdseed Boulevard."

"High! My name is Helmo! I'm so ticklish!" Said a smiling red puppet in a falsetto voice.

"We want you to come to our neighborhood! Here on Birdseed Boulevard, We have our monster friends here! There's Crover over there!" Helmo pointed at a skinny, blue muppet.

"Hi everybodiiiiiiiiiiiies! I'm Suuu-per Crover, da swinginest super-muppet on Birdseed Boulevard!" Smiled Crover

"And over there, is Beecher and Elton. They live together and play in the bathtub together!"

Helmo pointed at a yellow muppet and and orange muppet holding hands dancing down the street.

"And Finally, We have Big Avianthingamajig." Helmo pointed at Chicken Boo with a Cheery-looking bird head on his head.

Then the announcer began to speak.

"Birdseed Boulevard, 9 am on the WB network! Check your local listings."

()()()

The Next commercial was for Branimaniacs.

The scene showed Slappy pouring a bowl of Branimaniacs Cereal while Skippy skipped into the room.

"Mornin' Skippy!" Said Slappy

"Hiya Aunt Slappy! What's for breakfast?" asked Skippy

"Branimaniacs, from Smellogs!" Slappy held up the box for the audience to see.

"Awesome! I love branimaniacs cereal!" Said Skippy

"Me too, skippy! It's loaded with all the vitamins, minerals and nutrients for growing kids and growing squirrels!" Slappy handed skippy a bowl.

"Here, have a bowl!" Slappy instructed

Skippy then took a big bite.

"And for a limited time, You can get a toy in specially marked boxes of branimaniacs. Toys include skippy on a skateboard, me in my dodge viper, a Skippy digital watch, or a stuffed slappy with fake squirrel fur!"

Slappy held up a stuffed version of herself.

"And remember folks, For a great start to your day, have some branimaniacs, for that get up and go feeling!"

Skippy then disappeared from the shot.

"He had to get up and go." Slappy chuckled.

Then the announcer spoke on screen.

"Branimaniacs...Some toilet paper required."

()()()()

The next commercial was for a news report.

"Hi! i'm Mary Hartless! Coming up on the 6'o clock news, We'll tell you about the recent scandal where Phil Robertsdad of Eagle Extravaganza got fired for his opinions on the writers for the 1995 movie, Casper!"

The screen showed Phil Robertsdad spewing off his opinions.

"I hate the writers of that Casper movie! They're puttin' all these ideas into our young impressionable children's minds about communicatin' with the dead, necromancing. The bible clearly states not to try an' communicate wit' the dead! Those writers suck!"

Then Slappy appeared on the screen.

"Hey buddy! Ever hear of razors? Use one, and while your at it, go cut yerself!"

"And who are you?" asked Phil Robertsdad

"A proud supporter of the writers of that movie! My nephew Skippy loves it!" Slappy argued

"Well, your nephew's a sinner! Lovin' movies about communicatin' wit' the dead."

"Ah, you dumb southerners!" Slappy then pulled out a mallet, but the video cut back to Mary Hartless before Slappy could use it.

"That's coming up tonight at 6. and fighting the frizzies, at 11."

()()()

And the commercial break ended.


	10. Public Shaming

Chapter 10 - Shaming time

()()()

The show returned to air. At this time, Yakko, Wakko, and Dot were all seperated in chairs with security sitting nearby. Sitting opposite of them, was the little mermaid, along with her dad, and the prince sitting opposite. Larry was walking through the audience to get questions from his guests.

"I have a comment for the cute one." Said an ugly lady "With a skirt like that, you're practically topless!" she said

Dot had this one all wrapped up.

"I might not have many clothes...but at least I have all my teeth." Dot smiled brightly while the audience all laughed at dot's comeback. The old lady didn't open her mouth any more.

Another guest stood up to ask a question. He spoke in a deep southern accent.

"My comment is fer the tall one, ya know how sick that is? sleepin' wit yur sister? How old are ya?" he asked

"I'd tell you, but you can't count that high." Yakko replied, before turning to the readers "They don't get sesame street down in the south, so that explains their lesser intelligence and their attitudes towards other races."

Another guest got the microphone. She was a rather large woman.

"My comment is for the little one, you are such a *Bleep!*" The censor guy hit the button

"Yeah, well at least when I do handstands, my gut doesn't hit me in the face." Replied Dot, causing the audience to go "ooooh!"

Another audience member stood up, he wanted to talk to the little mermaid.

"My Comment is for the mermaid girl, why do you wear seashells?" he asked

"Because B-shells are too small." She replied, causing the audience to laugh.

An older man stood up.

"My question is for the middle child, I was just thinking..." He began

"Well, don't hurt yourself." Said Wakko

"...You know, i was gonna say you were the good person in that triangle, but i've changed my mind!" he said

"You changed your mind, does the new one work any better?" asked Wakko

the audience went "oooooh!" again.

The next guest who got the microphone was just a target for comeback. A very large, very ugly southerner lady. and she picked Yakko.

"My comment is for the oldest one, You realize that on judgement day you will be judged for your sins? Repent now, Lust is a sin!" she said

"So is sloth and gluttony. that's 2 to your 1." Yakko replied

"Are you calling me fat and lazy? I'm not fat, i'm a beautiful christian princess!" she replied

"Pride. that's 3." replied Yakko

"You're making me angry!"

"Well, I do have a kit-kat in my pocket." Yakko replied

"Not hungry! Angry!" she replied

"Oh, Wrath! that's 4 to my 1." Yakko smiled

The fat lady knew she couldn't outdo Yakko. So instead she turned to Dot.

"To you, girlfriend. It's not just a man's world! I'll pray for you!" she said

"And i'll pray for the chair you're sitting on." Dot laid a verbal smackdown

"eeeeeeee!" the fat lady held back a scream.

Then Larry handed the microphone to an audience member.

"Our producers have decided that you will take us into the last break." he said

The audience member stood up.

"We'll be right back with Larry's final thought!" he said. Then the theme played and the scene cut to commercial.

()()()

When the Larry Stringer show came back, Larry was sitting on a chair offstage.

"Well, first of all, i'd like to thank y'all for comin' on the show, and good luck to ya, I hope you guys find some happiness in your lives." Larry then turned the camera in front.

"You know, All people have feelings and they're not there to be used. If you're no longer intrested in someone, they have the right to be informed before you go and cheat or go looking elsewhere. When it comes to romance, everyone is entitled to their own choices, even their own mistakes. Say your peace, offer your opinion, then let it go. Except for extreme circumstances, people are usually happier when they are with someone they want to be."

Then the credits began to roll.

"So until next time, take care of yourselves, and each other."

Then the theme song played and the audience gave applause. the guests all walked offstage, except for the little mermaid and her dad.

"Who's gonna take her?" asked a security guard

"She's my woman, i'll take her." replied the prince

"You'd better take me first." said King triton, crossing his arms.

"Oh, geez. why'd you gotta embarrass her anyways, takin' her on the show?" asked the prince, carting off his future father in law.

Then Yakko bolted up and offered his services by kissing the mermaid's hand.

"Does the lovely lady need help being carried off?" he asked

"Sure." The mermaid just wanted to get off stage. Yakko in true hero fashion, lifted the mermaid off the chair.

"You know, You're kinda cute." she told Yakko

"Aww, thank you, but my heart is elsewhere." said Yakko, with his siblings catching up.

"Really? who?" asked the mermaid

"A beautiful girl by the name of Keri Russell." Replied Yakko

"Why are you always obsessed with her?" Dot asked her brother

"Because anything bigger than a handful is a waste." Yakko grinned

The mermaid was a bit more curious about human life beyond what she'd seen.

"Now people have been calling me 'the little mermaid' what does that mean?" asked the mermaid

"Ah, that's just a full-length animated movie that came out way back in '89." Said Yakko

"Oh yah, I liked that movie." Said Wakko

"You just liked looking at Ariel's clamshells!" Dot accused her younger brother.

"Can't deny that." Said Wakko

"Also gotta admit, the girl that modeled for the animators was apparently a really cool gal too. Not sure what she's doin' these days." Said Yakko

"I heard she wasn't very friendly." asked Wakko

Then Slappy reappeared.

"Oh, she was very, very friendly. Until a little brat like yourself decided to talk smack about her!" Slappy hit Wakko with her purse.

"Ow! that hurt!" Wakko nursed his shoulder

"Little house on the prairie, 1983. I bet ya gonna say the actress who played Willie Oleson's wife was a bad actress too, huh? Whaddya know about dramatic actin', huh?" Asked Slappy, before walking off.

"I still don't get it." Wakko was confused.

"It's a running gag, Wakko. Slappy showed up when you insulted the writers of 'my favorite martian.'" said Dot

"Yeah, so?" asked Wakko

"Then Slappy showed up at the commercial break when Phil Robertsdad insulted the writers from the Casper movie."

"Ok." Wakko was starting to sense a pattern.

"And then Slappy reappeared when you insulted the model for the little mermaid. and then mentioned Willie Oleson's wife from Little house on the prairie. Makes you curious, doesn't it?" asked Dot

"I guess i'll have to google the names of the writers and model when we get home." Said Wakko

"Don't you just love it when we practically give away the joke?" Yakko smiled at the readers.

The siblings eventually reached the prince and the mermaid's dad. the 2 aquatic creatures were placed in a truck with a water tank in bank.

"Ok, i'll take it from here. Thanks for the help." replied the prince

"No problem, the pleasure was all mine." Yakko bowed

"Ok, take care now." the prince got into the truck, and drove off.

"There goes one of god's undiscovered wonders of our world." Yakko sighed

Just then, the big lady that Yakko tore apart verbally showed up behind him.

"And there's one of the other wonders of the world - We wonder how she hasn't had a heart attack yet." Yakko joked

"You, you little ingrates! I'll teach you not to call me fat, and lazy!" she said

"Hey, you did it to yourself! come on, sibs, i'll buy ya some ice cream before diane gets back." Said Yakko

The Warners strutted off into the sunset. Just 3 more days left in their ordeal.


	11. Sunday morning Superhero

Chapter 11 - The revenge of the gossip queen

()()()

The next day, the Warners arrived at the community service office, and were suprised to run into a relatively well known superhero.

"Hey! I know you!" said Wakko

"It's the scriptureman!" Said Yakko

"We're running out of good parody ideas now." said Dot

The scriptureman stood there in his yellow and purple outfit, ready to fight the injustice and sin of the world. He quite often appeared on low-frequency VHF TV in Burbank, and that's where the Warners would quite often watch his show.

"And you are?" asked Scriptureman

"We're the Warner bros!" said Yakko and Wakko

"And the Warner sister!" added dot

"I'm Yakko!"

"I'm Wakko!"

"And i'm Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca the third...but you can call me Dot!" Said Dot

"Ah, doesn't memorizing your lines help a lot, Dot?" asked Yakko

"Ah, get off my back!" Dot shot back at her brother.

"Listen! I'm in need of some help!" said the Scriptureman

"Listen, we're no preachers, buddy, we can't help ya." Said Yakko

"Neither was Moses. And he lead a multitude of people out of Egypt, remember?" asked Scriptureman

"Uh-huh. But did God not physically help? That's right, God did physically help! Odds of that now, uh, not likely." Yakko turned to the readers "Yeah this chapter's gonna have christianity all over it, so stick around, ya might like it."

"But this is the Scriptureman show! It's supposed to be fun!" Said Scriptureman

"Supposed is the keyword, right?" asked Dot

Then Diane appeared in the room.

"Ah, Warners, I see you've met your boss for the day." Said Diane

"You mean, we're gonna help this guy?" asked Dot

"Can't I just pass a kidney stone instead?" asked Yakko

"Nope, you're gonna help him. Should only take the half-hour anyways." Said Diane, heading back into the office. The Warners all turned to Scriptureman.

"I guess for the next half-hour we're caught up in something we don't want to be." Said Yakko

"It's not gonna be boring! come with me!" Said Scriptureman, running out to his car with the Warners in slow tow.

()()()

Meanwhile, a capsule landed just outside of Burbank. the capsule opened, and outside climbed the gossip queen.

"Ah, I've returned...That Scriptureman won't know what hit him!" she said

Meanwhile, the Scriptureman's supercar picked up a unidentifable object outside of Burbank.

"What's this? it's an unidentified object, outside of Burbank!" said Scriptureman

"It's a plane!" Said Yakko

"It's a bird!" said Dot

"It's a big chicken, I tell ya! A big chicken!" Said Wakko

"No...My sensors sense that it's...really angry and really ugly."

"Well, if we have to fight Taylor Swift on her period, i'm out." Said Yakko

"No, no! it's not her! it's...Oh no!" said the Scriptureman

"What? who is it?" asked Yakko

"Please don't keep me in suspense! I'll have to potty!" said Wakko

"It's the gossip queen!" The Scriptureman had a dramatic look on his face.

"Nooooooo!" said the Warners in unison

()()()

The Scriptureman stopped his car just outside of burbank, and noticed the pod on the ground.

"That must've been where she appeared." said Scriptureman

"Wakko, Dot! Look for droid parts, i'll look for tracks!" said Yakko

"It's not a droid, don't waste your time!" said Scriptureman

Just then, the gossip queen reappeared.

"Ha! Scriptureman! I've returned! And now you're about to lose!"

"Gossip queen, how did you get back here?" asked Scriptureman

"I used a 1-up...Now die, Scriptureman!" The gossip queen pulled out a plastic lightsword.

"You cannot kill me! Romans 12:21! I will defeat evil with good!" Scriptureman pulled out his own plastic sword while the Warners just stood there and watched.

The Scriptureman and the gossip queen continued to fight. Eventually, the gossip queen pulled out a new weapon of hers - a stun gun! She fired it and hit the Scriptureman, disabiling him from fighting!

"Ahh! I've got you now, scripture-dweeb!" The gossip queen then pulled out a long rope and began tying up the Scriptureman while the Warners watched.

"You...You won't get away with this, Gossip queen! I've read the bible, your side always loses!" Said the Scriptureman

"Oh but I have won, Scripture-dork!" Said the gossip queen, turning over to the Warners.

"Now, you. You 3 will serve me!" Said Gossip queen

Instantaneously, Dot showed up dressed as a waitress.

"Ok, can I take your order?" asked Dot

"No, no, no! Not like that! You will spread the word for me!" The gossip queen screeched

"Ok!" Yakko pulled out a stack of bibles.

"No! Not that word!"

"Hey, next time you should be more specific." Said Yakko

"Put those bibles down!" Said Gossip queen

"We don't need to. They're not sick." Said Wakko

"Just stop, ok! Here's what I want you to do!" The gossip queen pulled out a list.

Yakko snatched the list.

"Ahh, this list is no fun!" Said Yakko

"What does it say?" asked Dot

"Eggs, butter, cream, Tampons, Buttermilk." Yakko read the list

"Speeeewww!" Said Wakko and Dot simultaneously.

"Hey, give me that!" The gossip queen snatched the list back "I have to stop by the grocery store on the way home. Here's the list!"

The Warners took another list.

"Spread gossip about people to ruin lives..." Yakko read the list

"Yes! Yes! And stop people from Praying to Jesus!" The gossip queen continued

"Why? I like Jesus." said Yakko

"I don't! I hate Jesus!" Said Gossip queen

"But Jesus loves you." Said Wakko

"And he loves me!" Said Dot

"Hey! That gives me an idea!" Said Yakko

"No! No ideas!" Screamed the gossip queen

"Lets all sing for our new special friend!" Said Yakko

The Warners all stood together and sang.

_Oh Jesus loves me, this I know_

_for the bible tells me so_

_little ones to him belong_

_they are weak but he is strong_

"STOP SINGING!" Screamed the Gossip queen

"You seem a little angry. Let's pray for our new special friend." Said Dot

"No! Stop praying! I don't like praying!" Screamed the gossip queen

"Dear Jesus, Please make the Gossip queen less angry." Said Yakko

"Stop it!" Screamed the Gossip Queen

"...and remember that we LOOOOOOVE her!" Said Wakko

"Amen!" The Warners all said in unison

"No! I hate that word! Just as much as I hate my acne problem!"

Then Wakko dug into his gag bag.

"What are you doing?" asked Gossip queen

"Found it!" Wakko pulled out a bottle of proactiv. "Here, this should clear it up. Maybe you'll feel better after using it." Said Wakko

"No! I hate proactiv!" Screamed the gossip queen.

"You hate everything. Ever tried loving something?" asked Yakko

"Yes! I love hate!" She screamed

Yakko turned to the readers "These trolls are everywhere."

"I am not a troll!"

"Ya could've fooled us." Replied Wakko, squirting Proactiv on the gossip queen's face.

"Ahh! you got some in my eye!" Yelled the gossip queen.

Then dot put on some gloves and began spreading the proactiv all over the gossip queen's face.

"Stop it!" she yelled, as dot stood on her shoulders.

"But your face needs this...just apply some every day and your acne problem will go away. Oooh, you look so cute with this on!" Said Dot

"I...AM...NOT...CUUUUUUUTTTTEEEE!" The gossip queen was ready to explode

The gossip queen then grabbed the Warners all by their tails.

"Say, does Cassandra Peterson know your Elvira hair is better than hers?" asked Yakko

"Stop already! I'm gonna make you cry!" she said

"Can't ya make us somethin' else? We had cry this morning for breakfast." Said Wakko

"No! You're going to cry!" The gossip queen was really mad

"Can't we go to Sochi? If we leave now, we might get to see the women's figure skating competition." Said Yakko

"Helllllloooo nurse!" Yakko and Wakko said in unison

"arghhhhh!" The Gossip queen was in a really bad mood by now.

"I know, they never stop talking about girls." Said Dot

"Shut up, all of you!" The gossip queen dropped the Warners on the ground. She then reached into her dress to pull out a new tool.

"Oooh, what else you got down there?" asked Yakko

The gossip queen then activated her tool, and became Super Sassy Gossip Queen 3, growing her hair to ridiculously long lengths.

"Ahhh! Now I am super-powerful!" The gossip queen flew back and stood in a bad pose. With the Scriptureman out of commission, it might have been bleak.

But then Dot stepped in front of her brothers.

()()()()


	12. She is the one named Sailor Dot

Chapter 12 - Sailor Dot

()()()

Dot stood in front of her brothers.

"That's nothing! Watch this!" Dot then pulled out a little stick. The stick began to crackle.

"Uh-Oh, I feel a theme song parody coming on." Said Wakko

"Me too!" Yelled Yakko, before grabbing his guitar. Wakko grabbed his drums. they began to sing.

_Fightin' evil with a cute smile_

_Winnin' love with a hairstyle_

_Never runnin' from a guy named Kyle_

_She is the one named sailor Dot!_

Dot went through her ridiculously long sailor scout transformation as a girl choir continued where Yakko and wakko left off, wholly concentrating on playing their instruments.

_She will never turn her back on a sale_

_at a mall for bows for her tail_

_she loves animals like raccoons and killer whales_

_she is the one named sailor..._

Then Slappy, Minerva, Rita and Hello Nurse showed up dressed as sailor scouts.

_Sailor Slappy_

_Sailor Nurse_

_Sailor Minerva_

_Sailor Rita!_

_Still not sure why Slappy squirrel's here_

_she is the one named sailor Dot!_

_she is the one named sailor Dot_

_She is the one...Sailor Dot!_

The gossip queen was all shocked and befuddled.

"I am Sailor Dot, champion of Cuteness! On behalf of the Warner movie lot, I will right the wrongs and triumph over evil, and that means one day getting a date with Taylor Lautner"

"Hellllllooooooo Twilight!" Said all the sailor scouts

"Ah! more victims for my beams of bitterness!" the gossip queen yelled

Meanwhile, Yakko and Wakko had untied the scriptureman while the gossip queen was busy with Sailor Dot.

"Oooh! I'll get you!" the gossip queen yelled. She sent out some beams of bitterness which was evaded by the sailor scouts.

"Ha! what now?" Asked the gossip queen.

"I think you've forgotten..." Said Dot

"What have I forgotten, Sailor Dottie?" asked the gossip queen

"That the other 2 have freed me from the ropes of bondage!" The scriptureman stood up. he pulled out his laser sword.

The gossip queen turned around to see that she was surrounded.

"Oh, scriptureman! How I hate you so!" The gossip queen screamed

The gossip queen was ready to strike scriptureman with her light sword. But then an anvil fell from the sky, dropped by the one and only Sailor Slappy. It landed square on top of the gossip queen, defeating her instantly.

"Ah, the anvil. Never fails." said Slappy

Then all the other sailor scouts glared at Slappy

"Hey! I'm from the 1930's, whaddya expect? An anime montage?" asked Slappy

()()()

After all was said and done, Sailor nurse was busy tending the Scriptureman's wounds.

"I can't thank you guys enough for helping me." Said Scriptureman

"Well, what are ya gonna do?" Yakko laughed

"That Gossip queen isn't comin' back anytime soon." Slappy looked at the pancake she made out of the gossip queen.

"An anvil. I had no idea that would work." Said Scriptureman

"Hey, i got a good one for ya scripture-guy...Phillipians 4:13 - I can do anything through him who gives me strength...and that includes droppin' anvils on bad guys." Said Slappy

"Wow. Slappy knows the bible?" asked Wakko

"Of course I do. I'm so old, I sat behind Noah and Moses in the 4th grade." Said Slappy

Everyone laughed at Slappy's cheap joke.

"Now i'm back to the tree. And if anyone says anythin' bad about casper or my favorite martian again, i'm puttin' a sawblade in your sandwich." Slappy walked off.

Rita stretched her claws out.

"I'm goin' back now too. Those kareoke songs from disney movies won't sing themselves." Rita walked away humming.

Minerva simply walked off with the nurse. Dot had already transformed back into her original form.

"Now, with the gossip queen vanquished, what do we do now?" asked Dot

"I say order a Pizza!" Said Wakko

"I'll be sure to head back to the lab! there's more bad guys afoot in this town!" Said Scriptureman, running off, leaving the warners by themselves with a flattened Gossip queen.

"Well sibs, 2 more days...i'm feelin' really good about it." Yakko and his siblings walked into the sunset.

()()()


	13. Down the Confederacy!

Chapter 13 - Down the Confederacy

()()()

The next day, Yakko, Wakko, and dot arrived at the community service, and were greeted by Diane.

"Hey Diane." Said Yakko

"Morning, Warners. Today you get to go somewhere far off." Said Diane

"How far off are we going?" asked Dot

Diane had a dramatic pause.

"The south." Said Diane

"NOOOOO!" the Warners all freaked out.

"Anywhere but the south!" Dot begged

"I can't stand it there!" said Wakko

"We'd much rather sit down and watch 'Return to the sea.'" Said Yakko

Wakko and Dot just glared at Yakko.

"Let me guess. The guy who gave Prince Eric his voice was an awesome guy?" asked Dot

"Pretty much. I swear that guy has the voice of an angel." Replied Yakko

"You'll leave immediately." Diane interrupted Yakko, causing the Warners to head out to the Chevy Malibu.

()()()

The next thing they knew, the Warners were out of Burbank and a few miles south of home. They were placed just outside of a big, majestic, historic house that was distinctively painted white. They looked out onto a farm field behind it. There were rows and rows of cotton fields being picked by african american people.

"I-i-i-i..." Yakko did his long Ahhhhh catchphrase "...have a bad feeling about this." said Yakko

Then a big person approached the Warners from behind.

"You!" The loud yell scared the warners to turn around "...Are gonna work fer me today!"

The Warners gasped in horror, as they looked at the fat lady they had insulted back at the Larry Stringer taping.

"You are gonna work fer me today! fer free!" Said the fat lady

The fat lady grabbed the Warners by their tails.

"Don't eat us!" Begged Yakko

The fat lady ignored Yakko's pleas, and dragged them into the cotton fields with the african american workers.

"Now ya'll do yer job or y'all gonna get whupped!" The fat lady waddled back to the house. As she did, Wakko pulled out a tuba and played as the fat lady walked.

"Stop that!" She grabbed the tuba from Wakko and threw it aside.

Wakko just stood there.

"What are ya doin'!? Do ya wanna get whupped?" she asked

"But i'm hungry." Wakko pretended he was a cute little puppy.

The fat lady kicked Wakko back to his siblings.

"Do yer job! No more fussin!" She continued to waddle away.

Wakko got up and wiped the dirt off.

"She...is not a nice lady!" Said Wakko, about to rage.

"Don't be gettin' angry yet." Said a worker

"What? Why?" asked Yakko

"We've been tendin' this here field for the last hundreds of years and we been plannin' a revolt." Said the worker

"Really? When?" asked Yakko

"Today. Me an' the boys are gonna go and rush that there plantation' and give them white folk' a taste o' what they been givin' us the last hundreds o' years." Said the worker.

"Alright! Can we go too!?" asked Dot

"Sure thing, lil' lady. By the way, Name's Solomon. Solomon Redup."

"I'm Yakko!" Said Yakko

"I'm Wakko!" Said Wakko

"And i'm Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca the third. But you can call me Dot!" Said Dot

"Well, Solomon, when are we gonna do this little revolution?" asked Yakko

()()()()

Meanwhile, The plantation owners were busy eating lunch.

"I'ma whup those little workers we got out there!" Said the fat lady

"Ease up there, Rosie. They're just kids." Said a skinny guy

"They're not just kids, Jim! They're little brats! Did ya see what they did to me on the television!?" asked Rosie

"Yeah, I did. That wasn't very nice of them." said Jim

"I'm glad ya agree with me. Now if ya could only get it through yer thick skull that I want a baby we'd be in business!" Said Rosie

"Sure." Said Jim

"And don't give me no hogwash 'bout us bein' brother & sister!" Said Rosie

()()()

Meanwhile, just outside the dining room, a huge group of workers awaited with sticks, clubs, anything brutally sharp and damage-inducing.

"Ok, Freeman, Jordan, Jackson, Jefferson, and Obama, go round that way. Rest o' yall, come in the back side there wit me." Said Solomon

The first group waltzed all the way into the front. the other group to the back.

"On 3...1...2...3!" Solomon and his group charged into the back of the house, while his co-workers raced into the front. They had taken the plantation owners entirely by suprise.

"Ahh! No! get back!" Yelled Rosie

"Get back to work!" Said Jim.

It didn't matter now, the owners were being dragged outside.

"Take em to that whippin' pole!" Said Solomon

"No! let me go!" Yelled Rosie

"Yer in so much trouble when we get free!" Jim yelled

The workers ignored the plantation owner's Pleas, and tied them both up to the pole.

"Now, where's muh whip?" asked Solomon

"No!" Rose yelled

"That's ok, I have muh belt right here." Said Jefferson, taking his belt off his pants.

"That'll do just fine." Said Solomon, taking the belt.

"Now, you two have been very, very bad." Said Solomon with his white teeth shining brightly.

Rosie began crying.

"And now it's time fer the rod of correction to do it's biddin'." Said Solomon.

The Warners sat back and watched the proceedings.

"What do ya think I should do, since y'all have been so bad?" asked Solomon

"Spank her big fat fanny!" Yelled out Wakko

Wakko's wish gave Solomon's teeth light up even more than normal.

"Now that sounds like a great idea!" Said Solomon.

"Wait! Wait! Stop please!" Rosie begged

The workers stopped.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I won't be bad again!" She sobbed

"You...You swear you won't be bad again?" asked Solomon

"Yeah! i swear it! i won't whup ya! I'll even start payin' ya!" Rosie's voice whimpered

"Ya gonna stop callin' us bad things?" asked Solomon

"Nothin' but good boys from now on!" Rosie sobbed

"And ya gonna stop whuppin' us?" asked Solomon

"Yes! just let me off!" Begged Rosie

"Let her off...Please fer my sake?" asked Jim

Rosie was let loose. She waddled back into the house, scared.

"Now, i'ma let you go too." Said solomon, letting jim loose. Jim ran after rosie.

"Now ya better do what we says, or else we'll just tie y'all up again!" Solomon stood there smiling.

The Warners figured they had the day all wrapped up.

"Well sibs, this may have been a boring chapter." Said Yakko

"But at least we served some justice!" Said Wakko

The Warners walked off the plantation back to Burbank.


	14. You've come far, Warners Credits

Chapter 14 - You've come far, Warners / Credits

()()()

The Warners arrived at the community service office. Almost immediately, Diane was waiting for them.

"Well, it's our last day." Said Yakko

"What are we to do?" asked Wakko

Diane had a smile on her face.

"I just want you to do the wheel of morality." Said Diane

Yakko's eyes lit up like saucers.

"Oh boy! This is gonna be the easiest day of community service ever!" Yakko smiled.

Diane took a seat in a leather chair.

"Well, start." Said Diane

Yakko raised his index finger.

"It's that time again!" Said Yakko

"To Roll up the rim to win?" asked Dot

"To slap Slappy the slap-happy squirrel with a slap-happy slapper?" asked Wakko

"No...it's time to learn today's lesson, and to find out what it is, we turn to, the Wheel of Morality!" Yakko did his Vanna White pose as the wheel slid into frame. Yakko grabbed the wheel's spikes and spun it.

"Wheel of morality, Turn, turn, turn. Tell us the lessons we should learn." Said Yakko. The wheel stopped on number 4.

"Moral number 4...and the moral of today's story is..." Yakko ripped the paper from the printer.

"You just take your brush and beat the devil out of it." Yakko read the moral of the day.

"How profound!" Said Dot

"Oh! Now it totally makes sense!" Said Wakko

Yakko turned to Diane, and extended his hand.

"Well, Diane, it was one heck of a week but we got through it."

Diane extended her hand shook Yakko's.

"Hey, Dot, did I wash my hands before we left?" asked Yakko

Diane couldn't rip her hand away from Yakko's grip fast enough.

"Gotcha!" Yakko grinned at a somewhat mad Diane.

Then that infamous whistle blew, the Warners all said "Yipes!" and ran away while Ralph the guard chased them.

()()()

**CREDITS**

**DIRECTED BY**

**Phil from Produce**

**WRITTEN BY**

**Phil from Produce**

**PRODUCED BY**

**Phil from Produce**

**ANIMANIACS CHARACTERS**

**Yakko**

**Wakko**

**Dot (also as Sailor Dot)**

**Dr. Scratchansniff**

**Slappy Squirrel (Also as Sailor Slappy)**

**Skippy Squirrel**

**Mindy**

**Chicken Boo (As Big Avianthingamajig)**

**Mary Hartless**

**Hello Nurse (As Sailor Nurse)**

**Rita (As Sailor Rita)**

**Minerva (As Sailor Minerva)**

**Ralph the Guard**

**ORIGINAL CHARACTERS (In order of appearance)**

**Mexican Hot Dog Vendor**

**Miss Terbate**

**Constable Loney**

**The Police Chief**

**Mr. Coholic**

**The Bailiff**

**Judge Moe-Lester Judymathiswapnerbrown**

**Officer Milner**

**Officer McCord**

**Diane**

**Old Elmer**

**Miss Carrie**

**Kindergarters**

**Mrs. Taylor**

**6th Graders**

**Hugh Jass Elementary Principal**

**Boy who called Dot Dottie**

**Larry Stringer**

**Larry Stringer Security**

**Larry Stringer's Audience**

**Helmo**

**Crover**

**Beecher**

**Elton**

**Phil Robertsdad**

**Rosie**

**Mermaid Princess**

**Prince**

**King Triton**

**The Scriptureman**

**The Gossip Queen**

**Solomon Redup**

**The Workers**

**Jim**

**CREDIT WRITER**

**Doesn't get paid enough**

**PERSUADED THE CENSORS AGAIN**

**Fabulous Flea**

**BEST SONG EVER!**

**Last Rites/Loved to Deth - Megadeth**

**OTHER BEST SONG EVER!**

**Don't wanna fall in love - Jane child**

**ANOTHER OTHER BEST SONG EVER!**

**The joy of painting theme - Larry Owens**

**CATERING BY**

**The Real canadian Superstore on Luckacuck Road**

**7-11 on Airport Road**

**Liquor Depot just over the overpass**

**McDonalds just over the overpass**

**Mandarin Garden on Luckacuck road**

**VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY, VERY SPECIAL THANKS TO**

**Frumouttamimind**

**(For Following my Animaniacs stories since day 1. There are not enough "VERY's" in the world that I can put here.)**

**VERY SPECIAL THANKS TO**

**UnknownWarner**

**Wakko Warner 22**

**(For all the great reviews.)**

**APOLOGIES TO**

**Sherri Stoner **

**(For the running gag.)**

**Any offended southerners**

**DEDICATED TO**

**Everyone who is working on 7D right now.**

**DISCLAIMER**

**Animaniacs and a majority of the characters were created by Tom Ruegger and the show was Produced by the former and Steven Spielberg. I do not take profit from any of fanfiction based upon mentioned works.**

The Warners appeared in the doorway of their tower.

"Aaaaah, i'm gonna watch beauty and the beast before I go to bed." Said Dot

"Hey, I hear Belle's animation model was..." Wakko was cut off by Yakko

"Good night, everybody!" Yakko announced

The Tower door closed and the show ended.

THE END


End file.
